Gene Wilder... the real deal . R I P darling man.

It's only with the heart that one can see clearly.
What;s essential is invisible to the eye.

This month was spent with my Dad.

Until I grew into a teenager~
Spending the month of August with Dad
was always priority.
Little did you know Dad .... what took the place of our
special summer time
was clubbing, music, drugs & boys.

The weight of that summer of 1986
was an adventure into the dark forest of experimentation
mind numbing &  running from realities......
Trying to catch the tail of  thaT Uncertain something.....
SEEMINGLY never quite attainable.

Looking back,
August with dad was sacred,  pleasent & forever
enlightening.
Dad,
How could you ever know
we never spoke about it.

KIDON BAUMAN

I met you roller skating downtown
near Washington Square Park.
Greenwhich Skate
it was in a basement
the tiniest roller skating rink of all time.
Dad would bring us there
maybe because it was right down the road
from the PUBLIC THEATER
anyway , Kidon asked me to skate,
the slow skate
where you skate as couples :backwards!!!

I noticed the skate rink was kinda empty
found out everyone was at the ROXY
up on 18th street.

The first time I arrived,
I walked in and up the ramp

the place was a Massive Cathedral
compaired to Greenwhich skate!
and Of course
the first person I saw was
KIDON
he had wings around his ankles (on his skates)

he was an angel.
He skated like that too
floating on air

there was a group of them
Khalil , little Jordan and his Best friend Anthony
and Anthony's sister Michelle and her best friend Pam.
There were older kids that I looked up to
admired, wanted to be like them
Super cool.

Kidon always skated with me on the slow songs
the "couple skate"....
I was eventually invited to his home
on 144 east 84th st.

His mom , Bonnie, was very special to me
and she had a baby boy named Beau
that Kidon was teaching how to speak spanish.

In kidon's room there was a twin bed with posters of the stars
and universe.
He taught me about numerology and constellations.

Kidon confirmed in me
 the very spirit that
he was,
 that he owned,
 that he is today to me.

Even if he does not physically take up "space" here
I know Kidon is around.

He visits me thru the numbers.
his number was 5
and he showed me that my number was 4.
That number follows me everywhere~ever since.

I was sure we would marry one day.

On August 2, 1984 ,
after Kidon battled and defeated cancer of the spleen,
for some reason it was time for him to go from this earth.

I was with my dad in Cambridge, Mass.
When early one morning aug.4 ~ the phone rang and woke us up.
It was Kidon;s grandma, calling to tell me the tragic news.
devastated.

I felt very special that they found me and told me.

My father passed this past November,out of left field.
No words could ever express the weight that loss tolls.
They are always close by....