there is no guarantee in today's life- cancer or no cancer

the gift of the moment-

the power of others discontent can be enough to throw a tiny pebble at your windshield 

my brother had committed to our mother's chemo treatments- of which the last two appointments land this week, of which all of a sudden he is no longer available.

Hospice is at my house , with my husband, and I do have feel utterly overwhelmed, when the expectation of my presence for my mother's final 2 appointments- seemingly rests on my shoulders. No wonder my back is in full spasm.

Is it the dilemma of my centered balance that I do not know who I am - if I were to tell my mother no.

Is it in the dilemma of my ego that I care what others "think" so If I do show up- that makes me a "great" person?

the dilemma of not fully understanding the full essence of my truth.

That I need to make a decision to be one person across the board.

My organic analysis- "The Spine" - THE UPRIGHT ATTITUDE, or Philosophy. How we "hold ourself upright" as a person (our posture) 'means' to the Body/Mind/Spirit Interface SELF-OPINION..which is determined by our basic philosphy in life. Anytime we experience trauma to that philosophy or the self-esteem it gives us, we may experience a sympathetic change in the spinal bones.. leading to a wide array of pains, spasms, nerve flow abnormalities and other problems. The holistic recommendation is Philosphic review.. Looking for my possible out of dated ideas about ourselves, that the trauma points-out.. as well as any SELF ESTEEM problems we may be having. it's about OPINION AND SELF ESTEEM that influences your posture in life.